Just wanted to type this out to help me to go to sleep. Came back from a fairly fun evening with some friends. We did a ramen party, had a ramen cook-off. I tried to emulate what I ate at Hida Takayama, which was their sesame ramen. I did a ground beef + carmalized onion mix, but there wasn't enough soup stock nor sesame flavour, so my ramen pretty much failed. Looked like:
I didn't make it to the top 3... but I thought it still tasted good. Maybe I'm just partial lol. We then made and ate cream puffs, played DDR, Super Smash Bros Brawl, Monopoly (I lost due to unlucky landing on Boardwalk), and Resistance. She messaged me with pics of her event. She got to see Adam and Jamie from the Mythbusters. How this whole thing turned out makes me quite sad. Ideally in a perfect world, I would have gone with her to that event. Maybe if I had more skill I could have made it happen. Economically, this event is a sunk cost, with the cost being emotion, so I shouldn't even dwell on it, but at the same time, it's good for athletes to look back at their previous games and learn from mistakes... so I guess I'll do that now...
If I asked her directly to go with me...
If I asked her directly to go with me...
1. If she was already gonna go with friends, she'd be forced to reject my offer.
2. If she wasn't going to go, and she doesn't wanna go with me, another reject.
3. If she wants to go and would be alright with going with me, then she would have accepted.
I think at the point where I'd ask, she wouldn't have been comfortable with going out to that event with me so it would have just been a rejection, probably in the form of ignoring.
I think at the point where I'd ask, she wouldn't have been comfortable with going out to that event with me so it would have just been a rejection, probably in the form of ignoring.
I kind of feel that me constantly asking her out makes me feel desperate, but at the same time though, if I don't ask her out to do stuff, who will, right?
Well, the most important thing is, she seemed to have fun today, and she shared her photos on FB, and with me privately on FB msg. I saw it and didn't respond til I got back home at like 12:30 am, which is 5 hours. I think it's fine, because the lil wait time will bolster up the image of me being independent and not absolutely bat shit crazily deeply entrenched in the possibility of being with her. Sigh.
Kinda feel sleepy now, but it's good. I don't want to stay up thinking about her, because I need to sleep. I'd probably dwell on what I should do for the next date. The fact that she still is talking to me suggests that she doesn't want me to disappear from her life. She keeps me around, so I must have some value to her. She sees something in me that's worth talking to me. My god I feel like a pet or a dog. See? This is bad. This is like... clingy desperation shit, but I don't want to be this way. But is this way true love? Like, would girls be turned on by this "devotion" or turned off by this "clingy shit"? I have no idea. Playing all of this by ear.
BTW, spending a lot more time with females, IE: The girls today at the Ramen cook off. They're nice girls, but they are no where near the complete package that She brings to the table. Bench marking Her like no tmrw, and she's passing with flying colours.
Well, just to think, me and Her, we have a differential in what we're feeling for one another. I think my job is to equalize the playing field by either me feeling less for her, or her feelings more for me. I like the latter option better. Maybe she still wants to know me better. I'll design a Q&A session with her for the 3rd date. I also have to design a way to ask her again for the next date without sounding like, "Yo, I'm available 24/7, 365 days of the year for you. Pick a day, and I'll be there for you." cuz that's just clingy. But I feel that way, and I don't know if I should or not. What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more. Lol j/k.
Kinda feel sleepy now, but it's good. I don't want to stay up thinking about her, because I need to sleep. I'd probably dwell on what I should do for the next date. The fact that she still is talking to me suggests that she doesn't want me to disappear from her life. She keeps me around, so I must have some value to her. She sees something in me that's worth talking to me. My god I feel like a pet or a dog. See? This is bad. This is like... clingy desperation shit, but I don't want to be this way. But is this way true love? Like, would girls be turned on by this "devotion" or turned off by this "clingy shit"? I have no idea. Playing all of this by ear.
BTW, spending a lot more time with females, IE: The girls today at the Ramen cook off. They're nice girls, but they are no where near the complete package that She brings to the table. Bench marking Her like no tmrw, and she's passing with flying colours.
Well, just to think, me and Her, we have a differential in what we're feeling for one another. I think my job is to equalize the playing field by either me feeling less for her, or her feelings more for me. I like the latter option better. Maybe she still wants to know me better. I'll design a Q&A session with her for the 3rd date. I also have to design a way to ask her again for the next date without sounding like, "Yo, I'm available 24/7, 365 days of the year for you. Pick a day, and I'll be there for you." cuz that's just clingy. But I feel that way, and I don't know if I should or not. What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more. Lol j/k.
I'll think of something. I always do.
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